Blasting Stereotypes in Autistic Females

Published March 24, 2009 @ 04:00PM PT

It's no secret that more males than females are diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum. Evidence shows that there are differing behaviors between autistic males and females. Some feel the diagnostic criteria for Autism Spectrum Disorders, the DSM IV, has neglected to address this important issue. I suspect Dr. Simon Baron Cohen's theory of autism being a form of an "extreme male brain" may be at work.

When people question if autism is really different in females than it is in males, I find myself thrown back into a nice neat square box from which it seems there is no escape. Dr. Cohen, however, has stated that we shouldn't assume autism or Asperger syndrome will look the same in both sexes. This is no moot point, as there are a lot of females who are either passed over, or denied a diagnosis, due to the lack of sensitivity in regards to ferreting out the unique and succinct differences related to how autism may present.

Dr. Judith Gould, from the National Autistic Society, states that characteristics such as shyness and over-sensitivity, common in autistic people, are sometimes deemed to be typically female traits.

David Skuse, a psychiatry professor from Institute of Child Health at University College London adds that because girls' general aptitude for communication and their social competence helps some Aspergers girls "pass"--they pick up on their difference and carefully mask it by mimicking other girls' speech, manner, and dress.

As an autistic female, I can identify and attest to Dr. Skuse's commentary, as it is true in my case.

When I disclose my diagnosis as an autistic person, it is not uncommon for me to hear these types of remarks:

"You seem so with it! Matter of fact, I have always admired how together you seem to have everything."

Meanwhile, I am thinking about how shattered someone's image of me would be if only they knew how dysfunctional, cantankerous, and unreliable my executive functioning skills are. I conjur images of people visiting me at my home and becoming alarmed at my sudden change in behavior if anything is set out of place. Also mentionable, is my incessant staring off into space, trying to remember what it is that I was, or am supposed to be, doing.

"But you speak so well and seem to have so much going for you! You seem so articulate and thorough. Gosh, I would never have known!"

When I hear these types of comments, which are often well-intentioned, it is reiterated that autism myths--including what autistic people should look and act like--need to be stamped out for good. It is important to realize that autistic people possess uneven skills. For example, being articulate, wearing make-up, and dressing in clothes that I think are fashionable, does NOT mean that I have it together.

Haven't we all been warned not to judge books by their covers? Simply put, casually pointing fingers--or not--at autism is a subjective business.

Here are some suggested links for further exploration on this topic (*mini-disclaimer*: I had to disregard some of the mild non-autistic friendly references and delve into the higher purpose these links serve) :

1. The New York Times: What Autistic Girls Are Made Of

2. ABC News: 'Underdiagnosed' Girls With Autism Struggle to Fit In

3. ABC News: Forgotten Girls

4. aspieSocial: Autism and Girls, Women, Females in General

5. BBC News: Autism 'may be missed in girls'

Share this Post

Comments (16)

Good post, Elesia!

Yes, besides our generally better language abilities, autistic girls and women often choose different sorts of special interests than autistic boys and men.

I think the Times article goes into this in some detail; that we often choose art or creative writing as a hobby, which doesn't really get flagged as an "autistic" pursuit, even though we might devote just as much time to it as autistic boys might devote to memorizing train schedules or sports trivia.

Posted by Lindsay Gehring on 03/24/2009 @ 05:46PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
Reply to thread
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Lindsay
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Great to relate your own introspection to common misperceptions of autistic behavior.

Posted by tom roberts on 03/24/2009 @ 06:32PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by tom
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Lindsay, thanks for your support! I'm freaking out because I just noticed a typo up above. The sentence:

"For example, being articulate, wearing make-up, and dressing in clothes that I think are fashionable, does mean that I have it together."

Should read:

"For example, being articulate, wearing make-up, and dressing in clothes that I think are fashionable, does NOT mean that I have it together."

Thanks for reading!

Posted by Elesia Ashkenazy on 03/24/2009 @ 06:54PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Elesia
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
This is good. My sister is diagnosed Asperger's but hates anyone to refer to it.The stereotypes need to be understood in the ways they are flawed.

I think the kinds of stereotypes you described encountering when you disclose your diagnosis will upset a multitude of unidentifiable emotions because the people you encounter who rely on stereotypes tend to attempt to deal with types rather than individuals. Since they are not speaking to us directly but to some a nebulous idea of who they assume we are, it's difficult to know where you can even begin to decipher the persons meaning or how to relate to them.

Girls are expected to have better social skills and it seems to be more natural for them to know the rules of socializing. I (from my limited veiw) always thought females were better at those rules because they created them.

As far as stereotypes for the general public (aside from what will lead to better diagnosing), the best way I think to challenge the negative aspects of them is to not acknowledge them as valid. The opposite can add to a stereotype as much as the stereotypical one themselves.

Multitudes will more clearly show what the real commonalities are rather than the traits that just become convenient to assign. We always empower more people and ourselves in the process when we can show how one set of traits isn't necessarily better or worse than another.It's not easy but it can help to have that ideal in mind.

Posted by Ed none on 03/24/2009 @ 07:26PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Ed
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Thanks for your input Ed. You raise a good point in stating that "traits just become convenient to assign."

Posted by Elesia Ashkenazy on 03/24/2009 @ 08:13PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Elesia
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
There's also still a lot of sexism in psychiatry and a many women get instantly pidgeonholed into the borderline category. It seems to be the modern equivalent of "hysteria".

I've had so many misdiagnosises in my life it's not even funny.
Psychiatrists, who took maybe 10 or 15 minutes came up with bi-polar, schizoid, psychotic, borderline and a dozen other things, after I had told them the same thing. Basically I was trying to describe a meltdown, before I knew there was a word for it.

Posted by G G on 03/24/2009 @ 08:50PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by G
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Miss Gonzo Galore,

I was also given three different labels, over a decade span, before finally receiving a diagnosis of Aspergers autistic. The neuro-psychologist I saw took two months to get to know me before diagnosing me (including testing). I can't even begin to describe the relief I felt to finally know why I was "different."

Posted by Elesia Ashkenazy on 03/24/2009 @ 09:14PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
Same here, I was so glad, when I finally found a specialist who took his time to make extensive tests and check everything thouroughly, before coming to conclusions.
The feeling of how everything makes sense all of a sudden is hard to put in words for me, too.

Posted by G G on 03/25/2009 @ 02:22PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Like
Reply to thread
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Elesia
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Thank you -- all very interesting.

Posted by Twyla Ramos on 03/24/2009 @ 10:03PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Twyla
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
My 4yo daughter was diagnosed on the autism spectrum a couple of years ago. About half the people we talk to about her being on the spectrum are really surprised because they think only boys can be autistic. Such an ingrained preconception.

Posted by Marita Leechbabe on 03/25/2009 @ 03:22AM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Marita
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Not only do some people think that only boys can be autistic, but they also think that autistic girls would never be interested in "girly" things such as the color pink, ballet, unicorns, dolls, or princesses.

Posted by Elesia Ashkenazy on 03/25/2009 @ 07:33AM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Elesia
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
My whole family has autistic genes from both sides. The males are less verbal and fit geeky stereotypes more than the females. The females could, more likely, be seen as having mental problems. Very verbal because that's how they handle the nervousness created by being around people. Oh well....

Posted by B B on 03/25/2009 @ 12:35PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by B
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
I am an ASpie from New Zealand. I read about this website on Facebook. I think some people have the wrong impression of what you are doing here, which concerns me! I am just beginning work as an Independant Social Worker with ASD adults and (sometimes) their parents, so this website will be very useful for me.

Posted by Leith McMurray on 06/28/2009 @ 07:55PM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Leith
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
@Leith: Thank you for your commentary. Hopefully, the message that Change.org is much more interactive than perceived will spread. Change.org users can actively post their own Actions, as well as recommend and be a part of the Non-profits section (it's actually a lot like Facebook).

I think it's great when community service workers look to the actual people in the communities they assist, for knowledge, guidance, and ideas. Glad to see you doing so. Best wishes!

Posted by Elesia Ashkenazy on 06/29/2009 @ 07:14AM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Elesia
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
Very good Elesia. It NEVER occured to me before that female autistics may be different. For instance, it *never* occurs to me to worry about my appearance or if my clothing is fashionable.

I think I also now understand why PDX ASAN group considers me bigoted- and perhaps why I should leave "self-advocacy" to female autistics- who just due to what little cultural training they were able to soak up, are simply better at it.

Posted by Ted Seeber on 06/29/2009 @ 09:08AM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Ted
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply
@Ted: Hey there! Thanks for reading my article. I appreciate your input. As far as ASAN-PDX, I usually try and stay out of *hot* conversations. I do, however, learn a lot from the information shared and disseminated on that group email list.

Posted by Elesia Ashkenazy on 06/29/2009 @ 10:38AM PT
- Report close
  You must be signed in to report content.
- Reply
- Like
For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment. In the process we will also create a Change.org account for you so you can track this and future conversations. Don't worry - we won't spam you. We just want to promote constructive dialogue and find that people are more respectful when they are not anonymous.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

reply to thread started by by Elesia
Check Spelling
- Email me when there are new posts to this thread
- Comment Policy
Cancel Reply

Add a Comment

For your comment to be published, you will need to confirm your email address after submitting your comment.

If you already have an account, click here to log in.

First Name:

Last Name:

Email:

Create Password:

Comment

Check Spelling

Email me when there are new posts to this thread
Comment Policy

Comments on Change.org are meant for further exploration and evaluation of the ideas covered in the posts. To that end, we welcome constructive comments. However, we reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive, abusive, or off-topic; that contain ad hominem attacks; or that are designed to subvert or hijack comment threads rather than contribute to them. Repeat offenders may be permanently removed from the site at our discretion.

Author

Elesia Ashkenazy is Asperger's autistic, as well as profoundly deaf. Elesia is the mother of an autistic son. Currently, Elesia is co-directing Portland Autistic Self Advocacy Network (PDX ASAN) in Portland, Oregon. She is also a community board member of Academic Autistic Spectrum Partnership In Research and Education (AASPIRE). Elesia possesses a Bachelor's degree in Speech & Hearing Sciences and she is also a licensed Speech Language Pathology Assistant. She enjoys public speaking and writing. Her blog: aspitude!.